Put Your Heart Into the WHY You Need to Change

Committing to a personal growth project is a lot like working out: You need an inspiring reason WHY you should do it, or you won’t even get started—much less keep at it. Unless your heart rallies behind WHY you should change your life, your motivation will wane quickly. And you’ll just stay stuck.

It’s a fact that most New Year’s resolutions to exercise are broken within weeks. Why? Because they’re made with our brains, not our hearts. Our logic tells us we need to exercise to feel healthier and look better. And while that makes logical sense, it doesn’t necessarily motivate us to get off our butts and head to the gym—or even walk around the block. But, when we find an emotional connection to our fitness commitment, we suddenly become more inspired to lace-up those sneakers and get moving.

Your Inspiring Reason WHY Needs an Emotional Connection

Finding an emotional connection is a very personal thing. Each of us is different and our circumstances are unique. An inspiring WHY we should exercise will be different for each of us, based on we are in life. An emotional connection, therefore, is a personal matter. There should be no judgment; it’s whatever works for each of us.

Feeling confident when meeting a new someone might be a great WHY among those on the hunt for a new love. For others, being able to chase the kids (or grandkids) around without getting winded could be the ultimate reason WHY they work out.

When it comes to our personal growth, the process is exactly the same. For us to be successful in making a profound personal change, we need to have a very special reason WHY—or we will eventually slide back into our old, unfulfilling ways.

WHY Gives You the Courage to Change

Unless we have a great emotional connection to WHY we need to make major changes in our lives, chances are we will not.

You see, our brain is wired to resist change. It does so to protect us. The problem is that, in its effort to look after us, it can also sabotage us. Every time we are introduced to something new, our body gets excited and triggers alerts. It’s if you’re telling yourself, “Oh, here’s something I don’t recognize. That can’t be good.”

When that happens, our brains automatically signal us to pause. And what follows is all that negative mental chatter telling us why we shouldn’t make (or accept) change, why it won’t go well, and all the bad things that might happen if we do.

Why does an emotional connection work? Because the only thing that can override our brain is our heart. If our hearts can rally behind WHY we should change—and that reason is strong enough to overpower all the resistance from our brains—we stand a really good chance of success.

I rely on this technique every time I need to change something about myself. Once I identify what needs to be different, I find my inspiring WHY. And the bigger my resistance to do it, the bolder my WHY needs to be! The bigger the discomfort I know I will go through, the more compelling my WHY better be!

Here’s How I Have Used This Technique

I am a recovering workaholic. I have done a lot of personal analysis as to why I am wired this way and there are many compelling reasons. Some go back to being very poor as a child and never wanting to lack anything in life again. Other reasons are because my work was my escape from personal problems, I was ambitious, and I feared failure. The bottom line is that there is deep programming inside of me that has pushed me to work insane hours most of my life.

That wiring has been almost impossible for me to override on my own.

I tried everything I could think of to change my ways—and I always failed. I had to find a WHY that would be stronger than all the powerful programming that was pushing me to work the way I did. Logically, I knew I had to change, or I was going to get sick. But that didn’t matter. I still found myself working too hard and too long—so much so that it really did compromise my wellbeing.

After being in the hospital with nine different doctors working on my case, my most compelling WHY finally popped into my head. I realized I was going to die young—and wasn’t going to be able to finish raising my children—if I didn’t make myself a priority.

• Did my brain buy into this inspiring reason WHY? Yes—I was flat on my back in a hospital bed.
• Could my heart rally behind my WHY? Heck, yeah! I adore my two kids.

This emotional connection to WHY I had to change helped me transform what had remained unchangeable for decades. And it gave me back my life.

To make successful shifts in your own life, first, find an inspiring WHY. Make an emotional connection to it that will fuel your heart with the power to override your brain.

For more insights, check out, “5 Steps to Finding Your WHY.”